I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
