i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
We have started to decorate penises.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
