i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
