so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
pop tarts are not kleenex
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
