I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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