small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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