No, drunk sperm still make babies.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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