so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
