I am in a vortex of obligation.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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