You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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