Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
