Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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