I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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