Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
