Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
