I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
