I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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