Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I supernannyed him into submission
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize