okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
