Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
