Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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