we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
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