The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Randomize
