So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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