I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
