My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
