Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize