awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
