god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
