Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I am available for nakedness
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
