We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
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