Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
