I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Randomize