Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
