hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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