you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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