Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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