I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
