help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
