man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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