what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Be still, my beating vagina.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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