i don't like sucking hair
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
