Just fell off a train. Bad.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
