i would punch a child for taco bell
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
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