i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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