Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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