I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
