Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
