I wish life had little blips of pornography
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
