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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
